Projection: How to Reclaim The Best in You - Week #8 of The Awakening Journey

Everything we see out there in the world is actually something inside of us. It’s like a movie projection from inside of you out onto the world. In other words, if you see something terrible in the world, that is inside of you. If you see something wonderful, that is also within you. If you didn’t have it inside you, you wouldn’t be able to see it out there. That’s why it’s called projection.

What exactly is psychological projection?

Webster defines psychological projection as a defense mechanism in which the ego defends itself against unconscious impulses or qualities (both positive and negative) by denying their existence in themselves and attributing them to others. 

Why should you care?

Have you ever looked at another person and said “they have a problem”? Then there is a good chance you are projecting onto someone else. When we do that, we avoid looking at ourselves and fail to see our own challenges and the work that must be done. 

Avoiding doing your work inhibits your growth, your development, your evolution, and the evolution of the consciousness of all beings on the planet.   

Not to mention when we project, we create separation and disconnect with both ourselves and others. 

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” C.G. Jung

My story about projection

I thought I was pretty introspective and aware. That is until our family decided to go on a leadership retreat together to Ojai California. 

Our family did a 9-day retreat with Byron Katie and it changed our lives forever. The retreat consisted of listening to Byron, a renowned teacher who had a life-altering moment where she awakened through her own suffering. After her life-altering moment, she woke up on the floor of her halfway house and saw the world as it is.

What was created from that is called The Work and it’s about uncovering the projection and turning it around on the self. The Work is Byron Katie’s approach to processing any kind of trigger, emotional distress, or anything that is going on in your life 

While it sounds very simple, we learned very quickly that it can be complicated to pull apart what we think versus what the facts are and what actually happened. The way we communicate with one another and take responsibility for our lives and choices is now foundational in our family system. 

At the time, I was struggling in a relationship in my life, and while ultimately I chose not to continue the relationship, this process gave me peace during and throughout the ending of it. 

My daughters learned how our minds make up stories about other people and now we call each other out.

How to reclaim the best in you

Projection often happens, because we are in complete denial of how we really feel so we dump it on others instead of acknowledging it.

In reality, we are never upset about the thing we think we are upset about. That's why we need to look deeper. Listen to ourselves and look beneath the surface.

In a way, we are like icebergs. Only a fraction of us is revealed and so much more is hidden from our conscious selves. 

Yet, if we stop a minute to acknowledge that so much is below the water, we can take time to explore those depths, and when we do, what happens inside shifts. And with that shift, what is happening outside of us shifts.

This is why the very first step to recollect your psychological projections, and reclaim the best in you is being aware of your real feelings. Uncovering what’s below the surface...

Only by revealing your deepest feelings, you will be able to change your inner and outer state. 

This week’s challenge:

Download a printable fill-in iceberg where you can list from "Do your Work" what might be "underneath" and whatever triggers you.

Or Download The Work worksheet and reach out to me and I walk you through it.  

“Every time you do The Work you are becoming enlightened to who and what you are, the true nature of being. To question what you believe is an amazing gift to give yourself, and you can have it all the days of your life. The answers are always inside you, just waiting to be heard.” - Byron Katie

Next, we will talk about Owning Your Impact. In the meanwhile remember: the present moment is where your best life happens!

With love and gratitude,

Darla