How to Remove False Beliefs and Blocks
This week, we are talking about removing once and for all false beliefs and blocks that are keeping you from opportunities and abundance in every aspect of your life. I've had a number of clients coming to me and I myself have also experienced this recently where something has arisen and it felt triggering. In this blog post, we will explore what’s behind those feelings and how to let go.
The False Narrative
A client came to me not long ago. He was very distraught about something that was going on in his life and his narrative was that he had done something wrong, he had made this huge mistake and it couldn't be rectified. In fact, it wasn’t a mistake at all. It was a blind spot that he exposed within his company that really supported the company's overall mission. He was so obsessed that he might have thrown somebody under the bus that he couldn't really see the gift of what was going on. He had served in a very powerful way by illuminating this blind spot and sharing it with the company. He was so stressed, worried, and triggered that he couldn't see the truth that he had done something awesome and wonderful.
Interestingly when we try to point those things out to people who are triggered or bothered or upset, it doesn't really help them. So what does?
Uncovering What Lies Underneath
First I try to get really still and present and hear what's going on.
Two, with this client I sensed that there was some kind of a racket or a false belief that was operating underneath. So after we got still, I asked, “What's really going on? What's a false belief?” He shared, “I'm sorry. I'm fearful that I didn't ruin the relationship, that I didn't harm this person's professional life, and that I caused damage.”
So the third piece is that I asked him to tell me about an experience in his life when this had happened before. I know quite a bit about his story because we've been working together for a while. So I sensed that maybe this is what was going to come up. He shared an experience from his childhood. About a parent leaving “him” after divorce and how he had internalized this as his fault and created a narrative that when he disappointed people, they would leave him. Of course, this narrative was all in his subconscious.
We all have things in our childhood that block us. Emotions that we don't have the ability to process and they block us from the future. They are like an open energy loop. So all we need to do is get clear about what the false belief is and close the loop.
My client and I connected the dots between his past and the present. He saw that it was not this situation that was bothering him, but the situation in the past that was unconsciously undermining him from seeing the real truth: By illuminating the issue in his organization they avoided a train wreck. And that is so powerful.
When I saw this client a couple of days later and asked, “Hey, how is that thing going after you connected the dots?” He looked at me kind of startled and said,” I forgot about it. In fact, I hadn't thought about it until you just now said something.”
That's the power of going deep, of getting to your unconscious beliefs and then just letting them go. Connecting those dots.
Today, that person is large and in charge, he is functioning in his business, and he's doing all the things that he needs to do.
More about the process
I had another client come to me, super triggered by seemingly a toxic relationship out there. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. And again, we slowed down, we looked at how this is, maybe something from his past, an old story that's resurfacing, but he couldn't connect the dots because he was so triggered and that obscured him from seeing what was beneath the surface: Abandonment by a parent figure.
Many of us have abandonment issues, whether that's, our parents leaving us with a babysitter, or a parent leaving the family after a divorce or even the death of someone close to us. So these kinds of experiences and feelings that we aren't able to process, continue to undermine us unless we do something about it.
So with this client, we again went through the process. What's the false belief? What's the block? Let's connect the dots. Let's connect your current self with your past self. And this is not something that has to take a really long time. This is something that can be done in a few minutes. He took the steps to let go of it. And afterward, he was shining like the brightest sun.
He was acknowledging himself for how he had stepped out of this relationship, how he had spoken his truth and said, this is what I will and will not accept. They separated and once he was able to release the trigger and release the trauma, he was able to see how powerfully he had navigated and so we were able to celebrate. We made a list of all the incredible things he had done over the past weeks. Things that he wouldn’t have been able to do before connecting with this false belief.
Now it’s your turn…
Connect with Your False Belief
So here's what I'm encouraging you to practice this week:
Find a situation where you're triggered, bothered, or upset, and dig deep to find that false belief underneath it. What’s really going on? When did this happen to you before?
Connect the dots to something in your past. It could be in your past from a year ago or from 30 years ago.
Get clear and honest with yourself that this isn’t about what is happening now and it's about something inside of you from your past.
Pivot into what you can do to forgive yourself, your past self, and yourself now and integrate this into your body, mind, spirit - into your whole system, and let go so that you can see the truth.
How much work you've done up until now.
How you have persevered.
How you've taken care of yourself and your past selves and will continue to do so going forward.
That's empowering. That's true control and the most authentic sense of the word. What's going to happen is you're going to burst into your own light. You're going to be your own source of self and opportunities are going to open up, not to mention joy and excitement about your life.