Being Authentic in Cancel Culture

In a world full of triggering events and cancel culture, how do we thrive as our most authentic selves speaking our truth, and living in a place that's from empowerment, not from fear? This topic is really important, not just for the sake of ourselves and our truest selves, but also for the sake of our world and the collective growth of our consciousness. So, how do we become the person that we want to be, say our opinions speak our truth, and not create divisiveness, not be canceled, not be ostracized?

Authenticity & Belonging

I remember many years ago, I watched a talk show host who was being interviewed for the first time. For many years she was the one who was the interviewer. She said that in the thousands of interviews she lead, the one thing that every single person she interviewed asked her on the commercial break was, “How am I doing? Did I do okay? Am I seen? Am I heard? Am I validated? Am I valued? Do I belong?” 

Those questions are a fundamental part of who we are, as human beings, we strive to belong, belong to our families, our communities, our teams, our workplaces, and our organizations.

Especially right now, we live in a society, where things move so fast and we can be canceled so easily. And so many people fear that. They fear speaking their truth, of fear being an outcast.

Embracing Collaboration and Co-creation 

I was talking to some teenagers last week, and a number of them were talking about triggering topics that are going on in our world today and the fear of speaking their truth and being heard and understood without being canceled. They are so immersed in social media, as many people are. We are a society of technology and being connected, which is so wonderful. We are moving toward a global civilization, right? 

And this way of being together, of collaborating and utilizing this time in our lives, this time in our history, we can and should use for the purpose of co-creation and evolving. 

So how can you be your true self, your most authentic self, and talk about topics, share your opinions on things that can be triggering to other people, and do it in a way that is collaborative? 

I'll tell you the secret…

The Secret is Love

You might think how can you be loving when somebody posts something or says something that feels like it's very much about you, or it's about a certain group of people, or it's insulting to women or to minorities, or to your dog who's sitting right there. I am sort of saying that tongue-in-cheek because part of this is just remembering.

Yes, it's love. And I'm holding this with Lila. I'm playing with love, Lila as the goddess of divine play. So I am playing with love. Not just love for the other person. But what's underneath that is self-love. 

Self-Love at a Deeper Core

I cannot emphasize self-love enough. Getting grounded in your own self-love because what you're being triggered about is actually something about you. Something that is a signpost for you to find a deeper place of loving yourself.

I know it seems like it's out there. When somebody posts something, or somebody says something that triggers you, it feels so tight in your body or in your head. It feels very stressful. 

The truth is that it is a signpost for you to look at your own self-love. How can you love yourself at a deeper core? When you go to this place how can you love yourself so deeply that what you are about to say/post/comment comes from this place of love and light?

This is how we need to talk about triggering conversations, things that might upset other people, this gets us grounded in our own most authentic place, our own truest selves. And when we create from that place when we post or we instigate a conversation or connect at the office, or at a dinner conversation, this creates something that's collaborative, whether it's conflicting with someone else's opinion or not. 

This is the instigator behind co-creation, behind making conflict turn into something that is beyond what might have been created, otherwise, from divisiveness to this beautiful light. Sharing your light, and shining your light on someone else's until it becomes so powerful that it burns away.

All that divisiveness, all of the conflicts, and all of the bullcrap. The solution comes from a place of self-love. And then yes, of course, loving the other.

Your Challenge

So your challenge this week is to find something that you feel very conflicted about. Something that you feel very triggered about and intentionally engage in a conversation around it. That could be on social media or it could be face-to-face for example in your workplace or with a family member. Engage in it from a place of love around this topic and for yourself.

I challenge you to see what shifts and to intend to shift something inside of you and also inside of your environment.

Enjoy it, have fun with it, play with your self-love, and see how you spread that in the world.